O brain, where art thou?

Lately I feel like my brain has temporarily left the building. I'm still going to work (only one vacation day in total taken so far this year!), still am pretty productive - but think I am losing my mind!

While I've heard that happens with pregnancy, I sometimes wonder how much of myself I'm losing. The hardest thing about being pregnant is not the morning sickness (which lucky me, has made a small comeback for the third trimester), but not being as self-sufficient as before.

I've had to start counting on others to do things I would never think twice about. Josh now has to load the laundry, while I can fold it - and he is in the middle of studying for the BAR! Since I tend to overexert myself with housework, we finally gave in and called a maid service this past week. While I am no longer disgusted looking around the house, I feel lazy for not keeping it clean myself!

The big consolation is that I am able to do a couple of things despite the expanding baby boy -
1. Work - While I am not now, nor have I ever been, a morning person - going to work everyday is something I tend to look forward to, as I get to be productive.
2. Cooking - I used to cook much more often. Two weekends ago, Josh endured some not-so-good meals - did I lose my touch? I have probably cooked less than 10 times in the past 5 or so months. However, I'm actually starting to do it at least twice a week - baby steps... but closer to where I used to be.
3. Knitting - I spend most of my energy Monday - Friday at work, so there's not much activity once I get home. My big "to do" now - before the baby is born - is to finish his baby blanket. It's going to take some time (I started on it in the end of April), but I'm over 2/3 done with it by working at least a few rows a night. Anything where I can see progress helps motivate me, and seeing how much of this blanket has come along in the past two weeks definitely helps.

So now I am sitting in bed with two funny little dogs, a kicking baby boy in my belly, unable to sleep. Since I'm already up, why not think about some of the things that I could not be without during this pregnancy:
1. Josh. One of my former colleagues says she doesn't know how women can go through this without a supportive husband. While Josh can't help out quite as much until he takes the BAR exam at the end of this month, he has been more supportive than he knows. Our families have also been very supportive, which is encouraging.
2. Ice cream. Need I say more? First a Culver's opens up nearby, and now the Dairy Queen Blizzard of the Month is the Girl Scout Cookie Thin Mint type. It's a guilty pleasure, but (seriously) if I don't get enough calcium, my legs ache and I limp (not so attractive) - so I'll take my calcium anywhere I can get it.
3. Breakfast. No longer an option. During the first trimester, it was generally something like apple sauce or smoothies. During the second trimester, it was frosted mini-wheats with my soymilk. Now it is berry, yogurt and granola parfaits. Anything to beat the small bit of morning sickness that has come back to haunt me!
4. Ninja Warrior. I had never seen the show before this past month, but given the lack of new TV, things like this help keep me entertained (and the not-so-intense intellectual stimulation allows me to knit at the same time).
5. Boppy Pregnancy Pillow. While I've typed about it before, words cannot do this pillow justice. It makes sitting up knitting, reading, typing and even sleeping more comfortable. I'd be amazed if I don't continue using this pillow post-pregnancy. My favorite feature, however, is that baby Ben seems to like it. He gets active whenever I sit on the couch leaning on it!
6. Sadie & Perry. Even though their competitive dog barking can be annoying, our dogs do entertain me. Given my now emotional state (and the fact that the long ASPCA commercial that would make me cry regardless of my current state seems to play over and over on TV...), they sit nearby and provide their typical companionship. Given the fact that Josh is studying (understandably) like crazy right now, I'm also amazed at their activity level - not as hyper as I'd expect for dogs that aren't getting nearly as many walks as they should.
7. Soymilk. I'm lactose intolerant, and find myself having to take about 3 lactose pills a day due to dairy intake. It's not the hardest thing to deal with - but if drinking soymilk means I take less of them, it's worth it. Add in that that soymilk I drink has Omega-3's (good for the baby, especially since I don't eat tons of seafood), and it's even a feel-good drink!
8. Dresses. I'm carrying Ben very low (and admittedly I can get jealous of those carrying high sometimes!) Recently putting on maternity capris really hurt, which makes sense since the baby is right there! I now rely on dresses for the rest of the pregnancy as comfort is key.
9. The Internet. Being a first-time mother, there are a lot of unknowns - many "is this normal?" moments. Different parenting websites and books have helped me realize that while I'm not my normal self, I'm not expected to be - given what's going on inside of me. Basically - it's normal for me to not be normal for now.
10. The Baby. Still 12 weeks to go, but I am very excited to meet Benjamin Michael. His activity level increased quite a bit lately (or maybe his larger size just means I feel it more - he was active during all three ultrasounds), and Josh is able to feel him move daily now. I've heard becoming a parent is the biggest change you'll ever experience - and no matter what books I do read (right now I'm actually reading a parenting one - What to Expect the First Year), I don't think I'll really get it until he makes his appearance!